Monday, July 25, 2011

The Cave

This was a good song for me to hear. It's also a song that I hope others will hear. And not just hear, physically, but really hear it. Feel it. In a way that the words speak to you.

Or, rather that Someone speaks to you through this song.

Once again, Mumford & Sons eloquently sing what I can barely put together in thought.

"The Cave" -Mumford & Sons

It's empty in the valley of your heart
The sun, it rises slowly as you walk
Away from all the fears
And all the faults you've left behind

The harvest left no food for you to eat
You cannibal, you meat-eater, you see
But I have seen the same
I know the shame in your defeat

But I will hold on hope
And I won't let you choke
On the noose around your neck

And I'll find strength in pain
And I will change my ways
I'll know my name as it's called again

Because I have other things to fill my time
You take what is yours and I'll take mine
Now let me at the truth
Which will refresh my broken mind

So tie me to a post and block my ears
I can see widows and orphans through my tears
I know my call despite my faults
And despite my growing fears

But I will hold on hope
And I won't let you choke
On the noose around your neck

And I'll find strength in pain
And I will change my ways
I'll know my name as it's called again

So come out of your cave walking on your hands
And see the world hanging upside down
You can understand dependence
When you know the maker's land

So make your siren's call
And sing all you want
I will not hear what you have to say

Because I need freedom now
And I need to know how
To live my life as it's meant to be

And I will hold on hope
And I won't let you choke
On the noose around your neck

And I'll find strength in pain
And I will change my ways
I'll know my name as it's called again

And unfortunately, I can't get the video for this song to embed. So if you really want to make your day, in addition to making me happy, go here to listen to the song. Por favor.

Sunday, July 24, 2011

Vacation, All I Ever Wanted

It would appear that this summer I have accidentally stumbled upon this habit of not blogging a lot or with some degree of measurable frequency. And I like it. For awhile now, I've felt this strange need to have to write something every single day, and to be quite frank, that's impossible for me! Especially this summer.

So to continue with this state of infrequent blogging, I'm hopefully going to write a quick post. You see, I'm on a real vacation now. Though class ended a few weeks ago, I've been working every day since. Which is totally fine! But at the same time, I also just needed a chance to chill.

Literally, chill. Wake up without an alarm, stay in my jamjams until an almost ridiculous hour, lounge around on the couch, eat too much know the drill. And I get to do all of this while simultaneously visiting my family up in Ohio. I haven't been here since summer 2009, so it is really wonderful being able to see them all. Oh and about eating too much food...earlier my Dad, step-mom, and I went out for breakfast. Dad and I ordered the same thing, and we both ate all of our food. Let me tell you, it was a lot. I mean, I ate the same amount of food as that of a grown man. Holy moly, I still can't believe I did. I was a little disgusted with myself actually. But hey, I sure can pack it away.
With this vacation, I also earned another pair of big girl panties. For the first time ever, I drove all 430ish miles from Lenoir City to Findlay, Ohio. The most Interstate driving that I've done alone before was maybe around 60 miles, but that was all in the state of Tennessee. The whole drive I kept thinking to myself, "Yes. You're really doing it! You, Ashley, are driving." With the exception of the mildly terrifying drive through a bad-a thunderstorm IN THE MIDDLE of Cincinnati, the entire drive was great. Only stopped twice and I made excellent time.

I'm also proud that I overcame my bad case of the Sunday-don't-go-to-Mass-lazies. Usually when I go on vacation anywhere, I often overlook the fact that it is Sunday. Oops! Didn't go to Mass. And a lot of the time, it is a purposeful oversight. In an attempt to circumvent the problem, last night I found out the Mass times for the church just down the road from my Dad's house. Though I almost let a case of the Mass lazies consume me, I did in fact go today! It wasn't in the morning, but then again, I haven't been to too many Sunday evening masses. So that was a nice change.

Though I did catch myself wondering if it was in fact the right decision. If that makes any sense. Though I was thankful for the chance to go to Mass, I felt rather disconnected today. I kept going in and out of paying attention and really struggled with being present. Perhaps it was the fact that the priest who celebrated tonight was the same one who presided during my Grandma's funeral 3 years ago. Maybe it was because I felt like their music oscillated between Mass of Creation parts/joyful-ish hymns and some funeral dirge sounding pieces...pick one or the other, don't do both. Perhaps it was the fact that their ushers for the evening were young teenage girls who wore Daisy Duke shorts. Don't get me wrong, the girls were extremely nice and knew exactly what they were doing, but I found the shorts a bit distracting.

Many things distracted me, but I too was part of the problem. So hopefully with this vacation and time spent with my family, I'll be able to find my center again. Recharge. Realign, what have you. Here's to being present, not just during Mass, but all of the time.

Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Catch Up!

I meant to put these up a few days ago. I still have loads more horses to photograph because I haven't brought my camera with me to the barn for, I don't know, the last couple of months. Anyway, meet some of my new friends!




Denver says no photographs, por favor.

Duchess likes to stick her entire head out of the hole. It's quite comical, especially when she yells at me when I walk down the barn aisle. She's one of many, actually, who start neighing and nickering when someone walks into the barn during "dinner time." It's one of my favorite sounds, a bunch of horses yelling at me.

Frankie (left) and Madden (right)

Eeyore! Love him.


 Clover looks so much better now than she did when she first arrived!


This is Horse Haven's newest arrival...Lisa Marie. She's the cutest little filly ever and very independent. Loves loves loves to play and is incredibly curious. This little girl isn't afraid of too much.

And a shot of momma Reba and Lisa Marie

Friday, July 8, 2011


I came home from work today after having a rather horrifically gargantuan incident of terror, and that's putting it mildly. And comically.

Anyway, when I got back to the house, I fiddled around on the internet, checking this and that. I was also a bit tired and decided to take a catnap. When I woke up because emergency vehicle sirens went screaming by my window, I sat there and my mind started racing. What do I have to do? What do I need to get done today and this weekend, before Monday?

And you know what?

ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. Yes! With the exception of a few minor yet regular weekend items, I don't have to do anything. For the first time since the first half of August 2009, I have a real summer break. Albeit, my break started later than most of my friends, but that was because I decided to take summer classes for 2 summers in a row. Class ended on Wednesday, and it ended happily and awesomely. I don't go back until August 17.

So I now know what freedom feels like again! No more school...for a month! I've had a whirlwind of a time these past 2-3ish weeks. Some parts were exhausting, amusing, hilarious, terrifying, sad, stressful, and character building. But I think I rather enjoyed myself once I look back at the big picture.